all I know about magnetism today

on ambition, the vulnerability in desire, goal setting, talking the long way, and continuing to say happy new year until deep march

Bernard Moitessier was about to win the first nonstop solo round-the-world sailing race in 1969. Surprisingly he didn’t want to stop sailing so he forfeited the championship to continue on to Polynesia.

I hear this as a parable reminding me to, as the cliché says, enjoy the voyage. His romantic revolt against the contemporary world makes me think about desire, goal setting, and the buzz-y term: manifesting.

It begs the question, is ambition unnecessary? Should we release all desires in an effort to be present where we are? Or is there a voyage without a destination?

Bernard Moitessier on his boat Joshua in 1969, during the Sunday Times Golden Globe Race.

To want for nothing seems evolved, but it’s anticipation, striving, and yearning that keep me going. Sure, Moitessier forfeited in order to keep sailing—but would he have begun or gone as far solo without a specific goal in the form of the race?

I believe we’re better when we are participating in our version of a race. And that our best chance at connection, growth, and progress is when we’re off the bench and in the game.

I feel most energized when I am in the midst of a project, so I’m pro- anything that gets me started. So I guess, I’m pro-ambition or at least intention setting. While we’re still in this month of resolving, below is all I’ve learned about the related topic: manifestation.

---

ON MAGNETISM

1 | So is clarity the key or what?

Voltaire said,
“Life punishes the vague wish but rewards the specific ask.”

I take Voltaire’s approach when I have a question or would love someone’s advice, thoughts, or help—that’s when specificity is useful.

However, beyond that I’m unsure how important specifics are. When Eckhart Tolle was asked what he thought about manifesting his response was: 
“Who are you to think that you know what you want?”

I could never have predicted, much less written down on a goals list, most of the best situations, relationships, or opportunities that have occurred in my life. So I see Tolle’s point, but I do think the fact that I’ve chosen a goal or desire to strive for gets me moving, which is an attractive energy.

So as useful as clarity is, so is non-attachment.

---

2 | Hold goals as loosely, as you’d hold a bar of soap.

I’m trying to look at a goal like a destination to put into GPS and start driving toward. I rather travel in the wrong direction and learn from that experience than to sit in park.

To move the needle forward, I must start. I can only gain momentum if I begin.

The biggest block keeping me from beginning is: indecision. If you are anything like me, you have ideas, hopes, dreams, errands, and half-started projects galore but lack completion. Choosing where to focus or on what I want is challenging, especially if I’m constantly rushing and distracting myself.

The only effective solution to find clarity requires stopping, being alone, and writing. There, I admit to myself what I may not be ready to admit to others:
the vulnerability in saying what I want.

I try to do some form of morning pages-eque journaling daily; however I use the new moon as the time to intentionally zero in on a few desires to focus on for that month.

In farming traditions, the new moon is the time when the soil is most fertile and wet. Therefore, farmers and gardeners often plant seeds then because it is when the moon’s lunar gravity pulls water up.

I choose to believe the 48 hours after the new moon is also a fertile time for us to plant intention seeds we want to grow by writing them out. So I use it as a reminder to set aside time to reflect on what's working and what isn't (yes basically an “ins and outs” list) but if you’re curious, here’s exactly how I do it:

1. Draw: a line down the middle of a piece of paper. (hotdog style) 

2. Write: LESS on one side and MORE on the other. Then, as expected, list out what you want less of on one side and what you want more of on the other. 

I’ve done this with friends or alone and I have a specific notebook for it. I prefer these monthly personal inventories over year long resolutions.

---

3| Beliefs = thoughts we continue to think.

I’m not a manifestation expert by any means, but I dabble enough to know examining our beliefs (both conscious and subconscious) impacts the process. What we believe about our abilities and our worthiness dictates the actions we’ll take towards our goals.

Lacy Phillips coined the term, “Expanders”, which is a way of using people you relate to, who have achieved what you want to, as role models to show your subconscious what’s possible for you. 

Abraham Hicks teaches that how we feel directly relates to our ability to find the path of least resistance to our desires.

And what we think impacts how we feel. So I’m learning to recalibrate my emotions the best I can, and using techniques to shift a negative emotion by moving it incrementally up the emotional scale towards a more pleasant or even neutral feeling.

I saw Abraham Hicks with Maddie this weekend and they said,

“You can’t think in opposition to what you want, and still get what you want.”

I’ve found having some level of delusion or beginner's mind useful in believing what I want could actually happen. I look at this less from a perspective of magic and more in terms of action and lack thereof. Meaning if I don’t believe something is possible for me, even if I want it very badly, the likelihood that I try is low. Oppositely, if I believe I can attain it, the likelihood of me taking action increases. And the more action I taken, the more momentum builds and evidence to support the new belief.

4 | Turns out, timing is actually the key.

When I was 24 I went Mastin Kipp’s book signing in Detroit. I waited in line for an hour to speak to him. I told him I was a huge fan and was working on a book myself for the same publisher, however I had a full time job and I was having trouble fitting it in. This is what he said to me:

“Go all in on Plan A, Plan B is a fucking distraction.”

… it would be four more years before I quit that full time job. (I’m more of a stepping-stone-guy)

But today, a full decade later, it is the advice I need to hear. I’ve been half-doing many projects but completing few. I see now, though, that I was distracting myself with a plethora of “Plan Bs” out of lack of clarity in my own “Plan A”.

I’ve been helping friends progress their projects, while remaining on the sidelines of my own. But I’m ready to get in the game.This means jumping off the diving board rather than circling the drain.

Do you have a plan B and A? Would love to know and you can leave a comment so we can help each we stick to it.

Your friend,

KD

I hope this was useful, if you have any questions about anything above, or about journaling, or in general, or anything at all, email me! : )

---

Need a book? The Long Way by our favorite sailor is a good read.It’s a nice one to have on hand as we sail around our worlds. Captain and I have been reading it. Even includes a map inside.

---

This week I spoke with someone who is actually excellent at sticking to commitments made at the new year. Madelynn De La Rosa is back on the podcast. She came over a few days before the holidays to talk about how some of the biggest changes she’s made in her life have begun as New Year’s resolutions. In addition to being one of my closest friends, Maddie is an incredible filmmaker, ceramicist, and tattoo artist.

---

PS. Now that the hustle and bustle of the holiday season has died down, taking stock of where I am and where I’m heading is feeling exciting for me. If that’s also the case for you or you’ve wanted to try journaling, I’m happy to help. The Write Kit might be useful. It is a self-study course about both journaling and writing to share.⁠

It has exercises on: practical journaling (i.e., self-awareness, productivity, goals & organization⁠), as well as esoteric journaling (i.e., dreams, beliefs, creativity)⁠. Plus, a module on sharing writing, i.e., pitching, publishing, rejection, and editing.

Let me know if you have any questions about it. Oh and most importantly it is half off for the rest for the month! code: "twentyfour"

---

Thank you for listening to Let It Out  and/or Spiraling—it means a lot always. Year in review episode comes out this week: subscribe here to catch it.